Thursday, December 2, 2010

Why Do All Good Things Come To An End?

By Miriam B. Medina

This is a popular "doomsday" expression which is most commonly utilized by people when they lose something that was once beneficial to them, such as material possessions, careers, or other pertinent matters.

"Why me?

But is it just you? Or is it everybody? Trust me when I say, we all struggle with adversity. Life is an ongoing torrent of ups and downs. It's when we're down the most though, that we feel so alone, that we feel like bad things always happen to us, that we feel we are targeted and picked on by some unseen hand that controls a destiny doomed to fail.

However this feeling has also been experienced by individuals that have gone through a period of physical and emotional abandonment from their partners during or after a relationship. As to what extent a person would agree or disagree or settle with this 'why me' statement depends on his or her ongoing assessment of causes, effects and viable solution methods to the problem at hand.

I would like to share my insights on this type of attitude in regards to relationships.

Whether the relationship is between a married couple, lovers or friends, there always seems to be a sub-conscious fear of the possibility of being abandoned. This abandonment not only refers to the physical aspect, but emotionally as well... Emotional abandonment can be explained as the removal of feelings and emotional support.

Looking back at a previous relationship, you wonder how did something that was so incredible, something that started out so beautifully turn out so badly after time. What happened. And if this has happened more than once to you, as it does to most people, in marches the 'why me' mentality, taking over your tattered psyche, taking command and beating your numb feelings into shape so you can function, teaching you to blame instead of to learn, heal and fix.

Originally, during the "honeymoon" period of a relationship, there is a tendency to put one's best foot forward, going to a great extent to conceal the flaws in one's personality and to avoid any anomalous behavior. Sentiments and feelings of sweetness, understanding, affection, caring and compassion are frankly shared, as the couples go through their initial phases of bedazzled bliss, oblivious to each other's negative qualities.

However, once the novelty and excitement of those fleeting ecstatic moments' passes and one is caught up in daily routine and responsibilities of life, reality begins to sink in for the partner. Instead of seeing the wonderful idiosyncrasies of their mate, a person becomes painfully disillusioned by his or her imperfections. The once embraced rosy picturesque dream of "Happily Ever After" is no longer possible, and that partner's disenchantment becomes unbearable. He or she sees the disentanglement of the relationship as it slowly unravels, from the honeymoon period happiness to years of misery, emotional damage and suffering.

To be continued: Page: 2

Miriam B. Medina is an expert Author at Platinum Level at

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